spoon are sexy.

Anal Retention and how it could affect you!

Good evening. There has been a briefing about a majorbroadcast, due to happen sometime today. The topicemphasised is highly sensitive. Until recently, there has been no law on spoons in general, it is now officially illegal to:

· Ingest spoons
· bring a spoon to the workplace or school
· eat with a spoon
· converse with a spoon
· and now specifically Anally retain a spoon
On the 30th March 2009, scientist Proffesor Lucy Turner made a breakthough in Spoonhysterical science, she dicovered while removing a spoon from somebodys lower intestine that spoons have serious health risks these are as follow:

· Skitsophrenia
· Spooneriea ( falling in love with spoons)
· spoonamnesia ( believing you a spoon)
· Lead poisoning
· Pacman ghost bait

All Prof Lucy had to say was 'Its a terrible world we live in.' Proffesor lucy had a case only last month of one of her patients suffering from Pacman ghost Bait, this was from Analy retaining a desert spoon. All the patient had to say was 'Simply horrible, every time i went round a corner or sat down different colour ghosts would come and chase me, and when i would eat fruit or drink Cola they would turn blue and would run away from me, i dont know whether im coming or going anymore. But i can tell you now ! depsite these ridiculous laws i will remain a spoon addict for as long as i shall live.'The government heard about this claim, she is now facing trial.